Then comes the dreamed day of going home with the baby. And now? With the child’s first days at home, a series of doubts, fears and fantasies may also arrive, leaving the parents quite anxious.
The baby’s arrival at home changes everything, from the family’s routine to the relationships between people. During this period there is a reorganization of roles and functions that demand patience and willingness from all those involved so that the baby’s adaptation occurs smoothly.
It is an intense, delicate period, full of expectations and idealizations that need to be analyzed and, often, reformulated so that mother and father can assimilate the new reality and experience this moment in the best possible way.
The whole routine of the house is changed to receive the newborn. The hours of sleep , meals, bathing are changed , there is no more free time. It is difficult for the mother to establish a routine during this period, as the baby does not have well-defined schedules yet and she needs to keep up with the child’s rhythm. It is natural that she is completely dependent on the baby and is therefore less available for day-to-day activities.
In addition, there is a change of roles. Before there was a husband and wife, professionals and children, now there is also a father and mother. With the new functions, there are a series of responsibilities and charges (most of the time, self-charging) that can disrupt the relationship with the baby. Other people’s guesses and advice also appear and, for parents, knowing how to reconcile these opinions with the baby’s wishes and the reality they live in can be difficult in the first months.
Calm is essential during this period. The desire to be perfect parents and not make mistakes is never common to everyone. However, motherhood and fatherhood do not happen overnight, this is a learning process that occurs from experience. There will be mistakes and successes along the way, but with the day-to-day experience, parents will certainly be able to play their new roles well.
11 tips to help mothers and fathers when their baby arrives at home
- Organize the house in advance– the space must be prepared to receive the baby before he arrives.
- Make a list of priorities– taking care of a baby and the house, for example, can be quite a difficult task, so choose the activities to worry about.
- Have a person to help– as the mother is usually in charge of the baby, it is important that she has someone to count on to help her with other activities (meals, clothes and household chores, among other things).
- Don’t be afraid to make mistakes or ask for help.
- Avoid comparisons– motherhood and fatherhood are personal experiences.
- Encouragement– even with some difficulties, it is essential that parents feel confident to carry out their duties.
- Avoid demands, comments and critical attitudes– remember that the error is part of the process.
- Avoid idealized thoughts– giving up expectations can often be the first step in adapting to changes. Plans and reality do not always match.
- Try to clarify doubts with a suitable professional(obstetrician, pediatrician, nurse, psychologist , speech therapist , among others).
- Talk– the adaptation phase is important for the couple and both may have the same fears, doubts and expectations.
- Be patient– avoid charging yourself too much and allow time for adaptation. Tranquility, disposition, patience, willpower and love are part of successful motherhood and fatherhood .